Jenny Craig Day 13 - Restaurant, Romance, Grilled Fish & No Sex
Today's Jenny Craig Tips:
* Don’t wait until the Jenny Craig plan has made you more svelte to treat yourself like you’re all that.
* A restaurant is no excuse to order diet-wrecking fare (don’t pretend like you don’t see that grilled fish and veggies entree).
And now, here are the details of my 13th day on JC...
What I Weighed Today: 190 lbs. (8am)
I don’t really date. What I mean to say is, guys don’t come to my house and pick me up and take me to dinner. The majority of my “dating” life is me driving to meet someone for coffee or a casual meal, followed by a short period of phone, text and/or email flirtation. The second date is "usually" a meal or movie at my home followed by pressure for sexual contact. The sexual contact is usually followed by a loss of interest by one or both of us OR a long period of non-committal booty calls that go on until someone (usually the guy) meets someone they want to be in a relationship with and cuts off the sex.
This hot mess is my fault and I know this. Men will only do for you what you demand and I have never been demanding. Well, I’ve attempted to demand and been soundly dumped on my ass.
You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire—they're exactly alike. –Dave Attel
When I was younger, and heavier and far less emotionally stable, I concluded that I was not the type of girl who had the assets required to make demands on men. I thought at the time that I needed to accept what was offered and be grateful because the reality was that I didn’t have any bargaining chips. Bargaining chips being: hot body, gorgeous face, family money, or even just a decent car that a teenage boy would want to be seen riding around in. As I grew older, I decided that I had lots of chips but unfortunately they were not of a value that made men anymore willing to act right in order to get to.
My new chips included: A decent income, a pretty face, intelligence, humor, ability to cook and a pretty decent sexual repertoire. All of these things, I felt, should have garnered me boyfriends who wanted to wine and dine me and do anything to hold on to me and my incredible capacity to love and nurture. Yeah, not so much! I get guys who can’t return a phone call, disappear for days or sometimes weeks without explanation, call me in the middle of the night looking for a hook up, or who insist that there is something wrong with me if I am not chomping at the bit to cook them a meal and open my bedroom to them on the second date.
I am not a chubby teen or morbidly obese woman in her 20's anymore. I am very confident about my assets but I am also pretty numb and have lost a lot of my romantic notions about men and their ability to love, appreciate and commit to a woman like me. I sometimes feel that I have lost my ability to feel feminine and open and vulnerable. The princess in me shriveled up years ago and the strong, off-with-their-heads queen emerged. The queen sits alone and occasionally allows a courtesan to come and satisfy her physical needs after which she immediately goes back to the business of running things. I immerse myself in my work and my food in order to avoid my instinctual need for love and acceptance.
We all know that a person can train herself to do anything. I have trained myself to accept the fact that a fairy tale is not in the cards for me. But I had a glimpse tonight and it was wonderful.
A young girl asked her father if all fairy tales begin with “Once Upon A Time?” “No,” he replied. A whole lot of them begin with “If elected I promise…”
I started getting ready two hours early. I exfoliated, plucked, shined and softened every inch of myself. I made sure that every part of my body, from my scalp to the bottoms of my feet felt good and smelled good. I wasn’t quite ready when Howard arrived but I pulled it together in a matter of minutes and went flying down the stairs. There is was, tall and handsome, with a tight button silky polo shirt that showed off his muscular arms as he opened the door of his shiny silver Mercedes for me. I hoped the neighbors were looking out their windows to see me get in. My stomach felt like Cirque de Soleil had set up their tents inside.
We drove to the marina and talked the whole way there. He told me that the night we met, he had passed me several times trying to get my attention and that it was my aloofness that had attracted him to me. He also said that there was a raw sexuality that I exuded that he felt the first time he looked at me. I remembered that night and to be honest I have no idea where he got all that because most of that night, all I was thinking was how I could get my drunk-ass friend in the car and home before she got gang-raped by a bunch of losers.
What I Ate Today:
Breakfast: Jenny Craig Triple Grain Crisps, 2 cups Coffee w/4 tablespoons sugar-free Hazelnut creamer, 2 oz. String Cheese
Snack 1: Jenny Peanut Butter Chocolate Anytime Bar
Lunch: Baby Carrots
Dinner: Dinner at The Wherehouse in Marina Del Ray. Sauteed mushrooms, grilled salmon, Dirty Martini.
We arrived at the restaurant and he had the valets take the car. I think I saw appreciation in their faces, although I couldn’t tell if it was for me or the car. Who cares? Princess Heidi has arrived. He told me I was beautiful a thousand times and I felt truly beautiful in his company. I ordered salmon and veggies and skipped the bread and pasta. I did have one drink to calm my nerves. He told me that his ex-wife couldn’t have children and that was a disappointment to him but that he thought he and I would have beautiful children. He talked about her nicely and said they were still friends. I’ve never talked to a man who was so honest about the fact that his ex is a nice person but they weren’t meant to be together and had grown apart. It was refreshing not to hear the my-ex-is-a-miserable-bitch spiel.
A man on a date wonders if he’ll get lucky. The woman already knows. —Monica Piper
After dinner we came back to my apartment and chatted. We kissed and things got a little heavy but I didn’t let it get out of hand and I didn’t sleep with him. I want to take this slowly. I want to see where this can go. I may even try to put my chips out there to assure that I continue to be wined and dined and treated like royalty. I think this guy might be willing to do that for me. I think this guy would be able to see the value of me and my chips.
After he left, I scanned the picture of us that they took at the restaurant and sent it to a couple of my friends and told them about my magical night. Right before I fell asleep he texted me to say how much he enjoyed the night and couldn’t wait to see me again. Wow!
* Jenny Craig Triple Grain Crisps
YUM! God, I love cereal. I can’t think of any 1 cereal this is reminiscent of, but most of us at some point in our lives have taken every cereal we have and mixed it in a bowl. This was like that. Corn Flakes, Fiber 1 flakes, and Special K would be the closest to this mix. They also added some kind of slightly sweet glaze to the flakes but not crazy sweet like Frosted Flakes or anything like that.
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